The Story of Red Hot Chili Lips

What do you do when you are in the middle of the day, during fasting month and you are thirst and hungry to death ? Sleeping ? playing cards ? bathing ? What , bathing ? Yes, bathing, it can make your body fresher. Having a bath in the bathroom is just common, what if we add a little 'wild life' experience, let say we back to nature, having a bath in the river ? Sounds good to me. That was what I do, I liked to have a river-bath in the middle of the day during the fasting month. We can just named that river as 'kali kidul' or southern river, as this laid in the southern part of our kampong.

...the burning sensations has made koeaing fell down to a dry kalen which full ofmud...

To get there we must passed the rice field, a spooky kampong cemetery and the sugarcane plantation. The river was in the 'Lemah abang' village, or literally known as 'red land', we often shorten that village as 'mahbang' or 'mabang' only. That day just like previous fasting days, me and my two buddies agreed to have fun in the kali kidul. My buddies were Soerip Pitik Sobo Kebon Opo Hajo ? and Nardi Bebek.

Soerip had a thin body, yellow complexion, higher than average boys in his age, got a shiny and bold hair,and he never forget to bring his sleepers everywhere he may go. While bebek was the crowned prince of tofu kingdom company. Right after the dzhuhur prayer call, we went to the southern river. Of course we must trough the lemahbang village and then turned left trough the spooky kampong cemetery. In this cemetery field there was a duwet (jamblang) tree, maybe its age was hundred years, but still, it got enormous fruits.

But there was more, one tree called as Cacil tree, maybe it got a much more older than the duwet one, thousands years maybe, as it was as big as the Batavia Government Palace ! This tree was worshiped by the lemahbang villagers, we could see a lot of gifts to the gods under the cacil tree.

There was a vegetables field nearby the cemetery, various vegetables like long-beans,corn,chili, soy beans and ground nuts. What a fertile land ! There was a hut in the middle of the field. The simple field was constructed from bamboo and had its roof from sugarcane leafs known as rapak .You can say, right in the middle of the day, during a hot and dry fasting month, this hut looks like a palace in dreamland to us as children !

Because we were tired after went trough the rice field and cemetery, so we decided to have a little 'relaxing' in to the hut. Didn't take any longer, we were slept soon. Time passed, I had been slept for hours without even had a single dream ! Our Great Prophet Muhammad SAW once said ; better we sleep than talking about others as it could be lead to decreasing our fasting quality.

But I didn't realize at all that bebek has gone home, there left Soerip only. Actually even the sleeping-atmosphere surrounds, he couldn't sleep at all. So he got two sucks conditions, one buddy went home and the other fell asleep for hours, it drove him mad tough. He was scared to get me up from my sleep, but if he didn't do it, he was lonely without things to do ! We got a very good sayings about this situation, it calls as eating the simalakama fruits, if you eat it your dad is dead, but if you don't your mom will die, but we'll see later that Soeriep had his own decision actually, "I must get in the hell Koeaing up no matter what !"

Red Hot Chili peppers....

In the mean times, I was in the middle of my dream, I was in the middle of big heaven's palace, playing with gorgeous angels, but wait a minute, what is that ? I see a fire, it's getting bigger ! Yes, this fire has firing this palace in to a hell-fire !! I could feel the burn sensation in my body, skin an mostly my lips ! Lips ? Yes, my lips is ON FIRE ! How come ? Yes, the reality say so, not even my feet or hands but my lips ladies and gentleman !

I was panic wandering around to get the fire off my lips, don't ask me how I feel, hot, pain and agony mix in to one sensation ! Accidentally I saw a little pond with fresh water before my eyes, I thought that that was the most fresh things in this world, without even think anymore I ran and plunged in to those heavenly pond...Byuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuurrr....! Shit....! What the hell is it ? I was get up and found I've been fell down from the hut, plunged in to some dry kalen (little canal to give the fields water flow) with no water but full of mud !

I wiped my eyes around, I saw the fucking SOERIP was laughing at my bad luck ! damn bastard ! He was happy to see his buddy fell down, what a rude boy. But wait, If it was a dream only why my lips still burned ? It just like eating chili sauce without drinks for thousand years ! And what we see in Soerip's hand ? there he got one real big red hot chili, but only a half left for some bites !! My interrogation finally revealed the secrets, he used those red hot big chili to get me up after he tried several tricks before with no result at all !

Finally his tricky mind got an idea to wipe some chili to my lips from surrounding field ! Little bastard ! Therefore I got my lips but this was not a common lips but THE RED HOT CHILI LIPS !

Koeaing!
Mad about HOT sauce!

M E R T J O N - The little dynamite !

There's evil in every good seed, even just a little, on the other hand, there's a good seed in every evil thing. That's the Tao Te Tjing's philosophy from the Chinese prophet, Confucius. It has something to do with mertjon a.k.a little dynamite. I think you are all aware that that little dynamite comes from Chinese civilization. therefore it just fine if we use Chinese philosophy to discuss about China stuffs.

...this mertjon look like some of the dynamite we see in common world but lighter ...

Over Betawie land, the Chinese influent is so dominant,including this little dynamite thing, so there's no festivals without bang-bang wham from this little dynamite ! No wonder, Betawie people is fine with all riots. The holy month of Ramadhan is the festival month or them, so it's fine if we commemorate with mertjon. If you are not betawie, you can be crazy to see the betawie's madness to riots on their festivals.

Mertjon, the little dynamite as little as our fingers, can manage a loud bang and make us jump from the chair ! Actually there's so many peoples have died from it. The other day I heard that one family was vanished by mercon blast around Cileungsi resident. It's ironic as the mertjon season commence on ramadhan month, the holy month for moslem and need a quiet atmosphere to do their prayer seriously.

If you have your habit sleeping after the subuh prayer time, I consider you just doing the luxurious thing for average Rawabelong peoples Van der Kebajoran. As in here those little bastard always blast their mercon right after the subuh prayer time. Bang...bang...boom..! You can imagine how bad my sleeping quality is. It's a mess actually. I got my red eyes, I got my patience's challenge every morning, sometime I can not hold to give them my bad words, ironically, I did it after subuh prayer time.

"What the f***....hey you ! A** Ho**...go f*** yourself kiddo !!!"

BOOOOOOOOOOOOOOM....!

Usually they ran for their life after I went out to get the hell'em out ! Did they feel sorry ? NOT YET man ! the other morning, the same ritual happens, even more evil ! I can not kill'em especially in this holy month right? I think it's some challenge and test from Allah SWT, beside I did it almost the same when I was a kid :P. I liked to play mertjon either when I was a kid. I did it professionally, I bought mertjon from the direct producer directly ! Two black plastic containers, full of mertjon for a month-full Ramadhan's stock !

My first mertjon blasted in my own room, I did it to frighten my sister actually...
"Hey sis watch out...I have my little dynamite in my hand....BOOOOOOOOOOOM !!! " I was not even finished my words when the little dynamite was blasted....!! Two weeks after the blast I feel there's a two ambulances inside my head !

Human,even i did my first accident but it didn't stop me though. As I am a real human, so I tried again to fire my others mercon left. This time I tried to show off to my buddy, Parjo. I chose the place purposely right in the middle of village bridge close to my house. I chose the time after Tarawih prayer time....

"Jo...give your attention to my head and shoulder little dynamite....if I start to fire my match to those little dynamites, I can blast Solo in just my eyes' blink, because the sound of this little dynamite is so loud..." I talked to parjo arrogantly...
"Is that so ?"
"Hey buddy, I give you my words, you see, this is the holy month, I can't lie to you brother..."

In a moment
I fired the detonator, but there was some mistakes, the ammo was too much given to the detonator it caused the fire blasted too fast, just like the lightning....."BOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOM...!" The victim was my right ear, after two weeks ago my left ear becoming the first victim ! Today I completed my total deft !

I went to the doctor after that blasting accident, the doctor was a Chinese , Doctor Boedi ....

"Hmm...you've made your two ears-membrane teared-off kid....lucky you it can be healed by average medicine only...."

The medicine was dropped to my ears, twice a day, night and day. Have you heard about Eustachian's channel ? That's the channel in-between ears and throat. So if I got dropped my ears by the night, the next morning I felt my mouth was so bitter, as the medicine flowed along my throat trough my ears !

That's all folks, Actually I just want to be the King of Mertjon in fact I have my deft ears.... BOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOM !

Koeaing!
Prefer the calmness